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What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Last Updated: 23.06.2025 01:10

What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

I keep hitting my front tooth with my glass while bringing it to my mouth unintentionally and the nerve in the tooth keeps pulsating. Does hitting the tooth like this cause damage enough that I could lose the tooth?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

How did the trans issue metastasize within just a decade from being a question of kindness and tolerance to a tiny minority to convulsing a whole society?

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

True - how I loved my mum!

What was the worst spanking you got growing up?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

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Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

What! how could you do that?

What do you mean son?

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Do you know what she said mum?